Alternate reality. Seems like a big topic nowadays, especially for the MCU movies! Spiderman No Way Home! And an ending I won't spoil. But all that ties to what I've been thinking. The idea of what could be happening if a different choice was made. What could've happened? Would it be good, or bad? Maybe even devastating! But doing so helps me reflect on the past and have a better understanding of what happened. I don't know why, but I like to think about what that could look like if a different choice was made. I would even cry! I don't care what people say. (Hence why I keep them to myself or writing to this blog that almost nobody reads.)
One thing that I'll probably never get over is that fact about that day three years ago. "OMG dude, still?" Why yes, I am. I'll admit I'm still salty about it. And I don't think I'll never get over it anytime soon. Why? Oh I don't know... Because it was out of my control. I had to see that dream getting destroyed and burned down right before my eyes. Could I have done anything abot it? No. It was all up to her. I couldn't force her, and no matter what I did to convince her, it had no effect whatsover. My fate really depended on her. What was the choices? Me, or him. Back then, I was nowhere near where I am right now. I didn't have a car, a barely reliable source of income, and very little experience. (The latter still applies to today.) But yet, I tried everything with my limited abilities and options. I gave everything to get her heart. What was her choice? Him of course. I nevr stood a chance, and I was expecting the blow. But I didn't know the hit was gonna be harder than I expected. It hurt like a bitch. Never in my life have I felt something so bad, seeing what I described at the time "the girl of my drams" not wanting to date me over a guy who abused her. That yes set course for this timeline. The timeline you're currently in right now.
What if... She said no to him? Instaed said yes to me? I woud like to explore that and see what could happen. How different the timeline could have been...
October 24th, 2018. Her ex called her. Tried to apologize and all, but she said no. She was willing to give me a chance! She could be mine! And I really can't believe it! She's going to be my girlfriend! We already acted like a couple. We held hands, kissed, talked about deep things in life. We were basically destined to share our lives together! Everything seemed so perfect. We would start officially dating on November 3rd, 2018. But even before we started dating, I already feel the affection. The love, the passion we have for each other. Thee desire to... have sex. The excitement we both had that we finally got what we wanted. We truly are meant to be together. She wasn't perfect, and I wasn't either. But we still did our best to keep each other happy. The pieces in the puzzle was a perfect fit... Was it? As the relationship went on, we would start to get into conflicts. She didn't seem to... be loyal? She would get so moody for no reason, and even at times threaten to dump me and go with her ex. Like, blackmail? This future is not turning out what I expected... So many arguments, and the fact that many guys were after her despite knowing we are dating. And the fact she kept bringing up her ex. I can't take it anymore!
Well... This was just a thought experiment. Who really knows what happned, but this is based on my intuition of her.
